emo is so scene!!: a tutorial

10 03 2006

“dear live journal, today will be my last entry, as i am going to kill myself…”

yes, emo. whether you’re in a music store, walking down the street, or listening to the radio, you can’t escape it. but how can you tell a legit emo-fag from a normal loser? well boys and girls, that’s why i’m here. to educate, as well as entertain.

step 1: lingo

emo– a>punk on estrogen. Often acoustic guitar with soft, high male vocals that dwell exessively on the singer’s feelings, especially melancholy remembrances of past relationships/mistakes in life. A form of music that diverged from punk in the ’80s, the name “emo” is derived from the emotive style of the lyrics and music. b>A group of white, mostly middle-class well-off kids who find imperfections in there life and create a ridiculous, depressing melodrama around each one. They often take anti-depressants, even though the majority don’t need them.

Emo conversation!
XxSlavetoAnguishxX: omg my gf just left me
acidburnedsoul: that sux man
XxSlavetoAnguishxX: i blame myself only i’m such an ass *cries*
acidburnedsoul: dude come over to my house and we can cut ourselves together
XxSlavetoAnguishxX: okay *cries*
acidburnedsoul: omg dashboard confessional has a new cd, i preordered it already
XxSlavetoAnguishxX: dude they’re my favorite band to self-mutilate to
acidburnedsoul: me too. i hate myself
XxSlavetoAnguishxX: yeah we’re such tortured souls, nobody understands how hard life is for us
acidburnedsoul: yeah we got it tough dude. pass the tissues

scene-kids boy/girl. usually seen wearing neon colors w/ black. leopard and/or zebra print obsessed. hair colored at least 2 different colors and cut at different angles. scene kids usually try to attain over 500 friends on myspace and post pictures up of themselves regularly. female scene kids just ADORE neon colored eye shadow and wear one thousand layers of eyeliner. hair of both sexes is usually parted to the side.

A good general rule of thumb when trying to tell whether it is a scene kid or emo, if you have to ask wether it is a boy or girl its a scene kid.

the take home message: emo-fags fail at life.

a public service announcement, from me.

~M

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12 responses

11 03 2006
Chip

Buncha sissies. Back in my day, me and the boys would let out our anger by playing some football, drinkin beer, and beatin up gays… not cutting ourselves and crying in our rooms.

12 03 2006
greenlightsabers

Hmm… I shall take this tutorial and study it carefully.

And a tip for the emos. If you cut yourself, it’s best to be in a warm-hot bathtub, full of water.

28 04 2006
YoyoStrokester

Yes…great tutorial,

Emos are fagirly music that is great to slash uourself, becasue you want to rid yourself of that music, but hey go for the new age emo, slask your throats!!!!

28 04 2006
Mad

hahaha! “fagirly”

if you slash your throat, it doesn’t leave you enough time to make that last myspace post, though.

29 04 2006
greenlightsabers

What’s even better is if you run a warm bath just before slashing yourself.

21 10 2008
emoboy

hy, i’ve got pictures of my new emo hair style
in http://tinyurl.com/59ps64

17 06 2010
dara

whats even detter is if you run a warm baqth just before slashinbg yourself

27 10 2010
LCD Protector :

eye shadows that are waterproof are great and i always use them”-.

25 01 2011
Trush Symptoms

~:, I am really thankful to this topic because it really gives useful information *;.

7 10 2011
peby punkstreet

punk is not dead……

emo is dead……

28 01 2013
Zj

This is so fucking offensive. Whoever wrote this fails at life… Emos don’t obsess over self mutilation. Your logic is based on a stereotypical belief. You’re an abomination to humanity and must be eradicated .

2 05 2013
Crap and stereotypical LIES

“This is so fucking offensive. Whoever wrote this fails at life… Emos don’t obsess over self mutilation. Your logic is based on a stereotypical belief. You’re an abomination to humanity and must be eradicated.”

Agreed. What a bunch of sh*t.

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